... a devastating dream over the weekend that our baby, who has long passed, was full of ticks (although in the dream, bizarrely, they appeared as tiny winged creatures; something akin to flying ants). i stood him in a bowl of water, with his head exposed, and the insects began to climb out over the bowl, onto me..

he stood there, calmly, waiting for it all to pass -- exactly the opposite of anything he would have done in reality

i awoke in a panic, googled instructions for removing ticks, and minutes later, dreamt that i told you all about this

how can i explain the feeling that i'm gone from your life.. that you don't know it, perhaps, but i do

between a devastating BBC report on Syrian refugees in Turkey and the horror i read this morning--

Nicholas Schmidle: Are Kosovo’s Leaders Guilty of War Crimes? : The New Yorker

--it's hard to imagine how our lives go on

i'm not sure how to explain my reluctance to see argo. perhaps my problem has to do with timing..
filmmakers are not politicians, of course, and the movie had been in production for some time--but i can't get past the unpleasant feeling that its release capitalizes on and possibly worsens an already terrible situation

almost every night, now, i dream of you..
the dreams are as painful as the waking