identity crisis

i've only recently begun to consider how crippled i am by the need/desire to be helpful.

i love being this; i love doing it; i get anxiety if i don't, because thinking about other people's anxiety makes me shaky and depressed.

if i were to stop it, though, to just feel like a friend or an intelligent, interesting person--not a helper--well.. there's a very real fear of having nothing else to offer.....